"Have a seat, Bob. May I call you Bob?"

"Yes."

"Well Bob, as you know the teacher also teaches through example. That is why we have point twenty-two on the student teacher evaluation sheet. Dresses appropriately and is well groomed. You understand, don't you?"

"I think so."

"Well."

"Well?"

"Just look at yourself. You look like an unmade bed!"

"Your hair is much too long, and is rot at all well kept. Your beard is scruffy looking. And you call those shoes?"

"They're boots. I walk to school and it is winter."

"Carry a shoe under each arm and change when you get here."

"Now shut-up. I'm here for only for one reason and that's to help you."

"Sir."

"That's better. Now, I have a report in front of me that states you wore a sweater to school that had a hole in it. What do you say to that?"

"If I did, I was not aware of it."

"You must learn to check your clothing. You can dress like a bum at home but not in school. We have standards."

"Yes Sir."

"You didn't wear a tie one day, didn't you?"

"Yes sir."

"Where do you get off not wearing a tie?"

"Some teachers don't wear them all the time so I -----"

"They might have permission. And besides they have taught for years. You will wear a tie at all times. Is that under stood?"

"Yes Sir."

"You have sports jackets which do not fit you properly?"

"I don't know."

"You will become aware of how a jacket should fit. Should yours not fit properly, you will not wear them. Buy new ones."

"But sir, I can't really--"

"Buy new ones!"

"Yes sir."

"These are serious problems. But because I care for you and your future, I'll tell you what I'm going to do. I an going to give you another chance."

"What?"

"I am going to give you another chance. Now this is what you will do. You will come to school Monday with a haircut and in proper dress. Nice shoes, tie, a jacket that fits, slacks which are cleared and pressed, and no holes."

"But sir, like my hair is a matter of persona1 choice."

"Of course it is. But what you seem to forgot is that teaching is a right that you must earn."

"But I don't have the money for a new wardrobe."

"It's quite obvious that you don't have a wardrobe."

"You can't talk to me like that. You can't --"

"Perhaps I am not making myself clear. Let me put it another way. If you do not do as I ask, you will no longer be permitted to student teach at this school and I will not place you in another. Now, do you understand?"

"Yes sir. You are blackmailing me."

"Not at all, I am asking you to behave as any normal human being. And this is much bigger than just you. We have to think of the University."

"The university?"

"Yes the university has a good reputation, an excellent reputation and I can not let you destroy it. Now will you do as I ask?"

"If I don't, you will not let me student teach."

"Correct."

"If I don't student teach, I can't graduate. If I don't graduate, I can't get certified. If I don't get certified, I can't teach."

"Well, yes, I guess so. What is your decision?"

"I'd like the weekend to think it over."

"Now enough of this. I have been very patient with you. As I said I am trying to help you; but I have already wasted a lot of valuable time. You will do as I tell you, or you cannot come back. You're through. Now what do you say? Will you get the haircut, shoes, jackets and other things?"

"-- Yes sir."

"Good. Then you come here bright and early Monday morning ready to go. Looking like a gentleman. And I don't want any more reports. I have done all I can for you."

"Yes sir and I thank you."

"You are more than welcome. Now let me shake your hand. Good luck Bob. I am sure you will do well. Good-bye."

"Good-bye sir and again thank you."

"Think nothing of it. That is what I am here for. Now have a good weekend."

"Same to you."

_____________________________________________

Some twenty years ago. I observed students who were embarrassed by their parents, ashamed of them, even hateful of them. This was especially the case with college-tracked students whose fathers were not employed in college graduate types of jobs. Kids whose fathers came to school open houses and PTA meetings, not in suits or jackets and ties, but rather in other, less sophisticated, dross. The son, who was ashamed of his rather, a carpenter, who came in blue jeans, flannel shirt, and black wool stocking cap. The daughter who hated her father for showing up in a blue uniform with "Bill" on the front and "Jake's Esso" on the back. The various students who were angered by the black fingernails and almost permanently stained hands of their mechanic, machinist and welder fathers, The young girl who hated her father because she had to admit in class, as part of a survey, that he collected trash for the city.

Some were embarrassed when their parents mispronounced words, used double negatives, or said, "Ain't." Some hated the ways their mothers looked and dressed. A housedress could greatly depress. A mother, who was short, fat and had no teeth, often brought tears to kids. And parents speaking in heavy accented and broken English made some kids run and hide.

And cars, they could be really devastating. Having others see you being picked up after school by a parent driving an old, rusty, broken down pick-up truck could be an embarrassment impossible to overcome. Kids, lots of kids, envied others, whose parents drove new cars, spoke perfect English and dressed immaculately. Many lied and made up stories in which their parents were like the others. They created better parents for themselves.

Most of these things have been, most often, blamed on the children themselves by saying its peer group pressure. But just what is peer group pressure?

What with schools forcing teachers to purposely model upper middle class, if not upper class standards; is it not all but inevitable that some student should regard with shame parents who do not measure up to those standards.

 

Christ, how I do hate the progress of civilization